'America's Next Top Model' recap: Consumer Retorts

tyra-banks-antm-15-320.jpgIf you were looking forward to an episode in which people pick on Kyle a bunch and she threatens to go home seventeen times, and in which Eboni talks a lot about how she's a grown-ass woman even though she looks about eight, you're in luck!

For the week's challenge, brand strategist of indeterminate Nordic origins Martin Lindstrom has the girls film ad-libbed commercials for random fake products with dual purposes, like glow in the dark facial tissue or breath-freshening coffee. They're supposed to incorporate their stupid fake superpowers as well, and focus on giving a positive first impression to potential consumers. The Brits are pretty good overall, though Ashley does get very weird in her ad for scented toilet paper and lets us in on the fact that her boyfriend is a butt sniffer. Annaliese and Sophie in particular know how to be affably pushy and likably perky, respectively. On the American side, there are a lot of clunkers, and Laura seems to want to do something nefarious with trash bags.

Martin freaks everyone out when he reveals that the judges for this challenge will be a focus group of real live consumers who will evaluate the commercials and talk about who they like best. The poor models have to watch their evaluations, and we quickly learn that focus groups are mean and racist. One guy actually criticizes Alisha's "African accent," and the look on J. Alexander's face is priceless. The focus group likes Annaliese, Sophie and Kyle the best. The praise for Kyle is controversial, as she was likable but actually kind of sucked at trying to sell the product. Such is the power of Next-Doorsia! Several of the others turn on her, and she runs out of the room and says that she's not sure if she wants to stay in the competition. Everyone basically thinks that she needs to grow a) tougher skin; b) a set of ovaries, and eventually J. Alexander talks her off of the ledge. In the end, Annaliese wins the challenge and the entire British team gets diamond bracelets. Kyle calls home with news that she wants to go home, and her mom wisely advises her to sleep on it.