'Bachelor Pad' recap: Mean Girls
Natalie is consoling Dave (her double secret air quote boyfriend), and she thinks that Dave had to make a ridiculous decision. We assume she means deciding to come on this show. But she clarifies: He actually had to choose someone to kick off, and THAT is ridiculous. As opposed to the entire series of unfortunate events that led him to think that a life spent on increasingly awful reality television shows is somehow a wise choice. We mean, CHOICES, Dave! And I'm not talking about the choice between one vapid pipsqueak drama queen (Gia) and one loud-mouthed bleachy haired honky (Elizabeth) who happens to be your fake friend's sometimes girlfriend.
Anyway, Wes is unhappy that Dave sent his momentary flame home to hang out with her boyfriend when it was clear to everyone watching that Gia's Wall of Boyfriendness that she was hiding behind was crumbling bit by bit, and with just a few more hours of platonic cuddling Wes would totally get Gia to philander on national television. Dave (correctly) calls Wes a jackass, but the pot-kettle nature of the jab is too much for Wes. He storms off claiming that he has never met a group of people more full of s*** in his entire life, which is pretty impressive labeling considering he was on an actual season of "The Bachelorette" ... Outside, Wes tells Peculiar Jesse and Vampire Queen Gwen that he wants to arrange a pugilistic contest with Dave, because, yeah, why the fuck not? Gwen points out that it would probably not help his chances at building long-lasting friendships or winning the $250,000 carrot they keep holding in front of these horses. Wes pouts instead.
Photo credit: ABC