'Big Brother 12': Double eviction all the way

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" Big Brother 12" makes all of our dreams come true and gets rid of two houseguests in one night. That's right, folks: it's double eviction time!

Previously: Britney nominated Brendon and Enzo for eviction, with Brendon as the target; Brendon won POV; The Brigade campaigned to get Matt put up in his place; Matt turned against his ally and tried to get Britney to put up Ragan; Britney listened to The Brigade and put up Matt.

A super fabulous-looking Julie greets us for my very favorite "Big Brother" episode of the season: double elimination! That's right, two of these idiots go home, and there are literally so many things to accomplish in the hour that the show has no room for filler. It's a recapper's dream.

The Brigade Revealed (Sort Of)
Once Matt figures out that Ragan knows about his betrayal, he realizes he doesn't have the votes he needs to stay in the house and goes into scramble mode. His first reaction is to flat-out lie to Ragan and tell him he threw him under the bus inadvertently in his defense of both of them. Ragan somehow believes him, I think? I would call him dumb, but his subsequent talk with Enzo about the subject gives him the knowledge to figure out that Lane, Hayden, Enzo and Matt are in an alliance. Matt tries to use this to his advantage to somehow keep him in the house, but Hayden is still plenty suspicious of his former alliance-mate. Ragan's discovery of The Brigade has finally woken him up to the game, however, and he spends a good chunk of time going over events of the house (for a potential recall competition in the future) and devising schemes of how to break up the all-boys alliance. He also talks to himself -- a lot -- so he might be going crazy.

Eviction #1
Enzo and Matt give their final plea speeches, and from Matt's demeanor it seems like he knows he's toast. He's right, and is evicted unanimously. These unanimous votes are getting really, really boring you guys. Someone needs to stir this house UP! In his exit interview, Matt admits he threw the last HoH competition because he thought he was safe and it was his worst decision in the entire game. Matt then calls Britney a succubus and Julie says to be careful because it's a bad word. Really? I'm pretty sure Julie thought Matt said something else. Matt then talks about what we already know, that he tried to be wishy washy and play both sides of the house and it blew up right in his face. Yeah, it did.

HoH Competition #1
The first competition of the night is called "Delivering the Goods." In this game, they are asked a question with two other houseguests' names as answers. They must search through giant boxes of packing peanuts in order to find the correct names. First person to find them (one at a time, mind you) wins. The question is: which two houseguests have won HoH two times? The answer, obviously, is Matt and Rachel. Hayden moves faster than we've ever seen him scoot, and wins.

Nomination Ceremony
Hayden has only a few short minutes to make his nominations, and Brendon is immediately in his ear trying to save his newly-shorn skull. There's basically no hiding The Brigade in this sort of situation, and Hayden, Lane and Enzo very blatantly get together and scheme. Brendon butts his way in there AGAIN, and I admire his persistence. Predictably, Hayden nominates Brendon and Ragan for eviction. Can Brendon save himself yet again? We'll find out...in like two minutes! Man, I love double eviction night.

POV Competition & Ceremony
This competition is "Before or After," a very familiar game to veteran "Big Brother" viewers. Since there are so few houseguests remaining, they all compete for the POV. None of them do it as stylishly as Britney in her skirt and heels, however. Especially not poor Enzo in that godforsaken penguin suit. Brendon doesn't manage to pull out another win, and things aren't looking good for him. Things get even more dire when Ragan wins the veto and saves himself! DRAMA! (OK, not really.) SLIGHT INTEREST! (That's better.) Hayden nominates Britney in Ragan's place.

Eviction #2
With very little fanfare, Brendon is unanimously evicted. Honestly, if they had more time The Brigade might realize that getting rid of Brendon isn't necessarily their best play considering he really has no allies. However, they have no time to think and so it goes as predicted. I actually feel a little bit sorry for Brendon. I'm obviously very, very tired. Upon exiting, a shell-shocked Brendon admits that he really doesn't have any idea what's going on in the house, but he does think that if Ragan hadn't won POV then he would be the one sitting on couch with Julie instead.

Instead of starting a new HoH Competition, Julie tells us to tune in Sunday to find out what happens next. Nooooooooooo! I want more!

See you Sunday, dear readers.


Favorite quotes:
  • "I'm asking you because you're a girl and you can probably tune into him better than I can." - Matt, dealing in stereotypes re: Ragan
  • "I Baba Booeyed this one, it was a bad decision." - Matt, on throwing the last HoH competition
  • "Nobody understands, but you're locked in that house and it's a really nice version of prison." - Brendon

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Photo Credit: CBS