'Bones' recap: So Brennan thinks she can dance?

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Brennan can't dance. Not unless it's a dream sequence anyway. For all her many fine qualities, we learn in "The Diamond in the Rough" that Dr. Temperance Brennan of "Bones" is a rotten dancer.

Fortunately, she's much better at solving crimes.


The crime

Thanks to Sweets ( John Francis Daley) being obsessed with late-night reality garbage, the team gets hold of a strange skeleton encrusted with crystals. It turns out that the murder victim was a dancer named Katerina Wurz (played by "So You Think You Can Dance" season 9 winner Eliana Girard).

Katerina and her partner Kendrick ( Dmitry Chaplin) were up-and-coming dancers in a televised competition, and it soon becomes clear that this competition is the only motive for murder. In order to catch a killer, someone has to dance.


Undercover with Buck and Wanda

Booth ( David Boreanaz) and Brennan ( Emily Deschanel) quickly head undercover, using their favorite aliases of Buck and Wanda Moosejaw. This is not an altogether hopeless endeavor. After all, Booth used to be a dance teacher when he was in college (thanks to lessons from his rarely mentioned mother). And Brennan is really good at looking at skeletal movements that she can imitate.

Or so she thinks.


Horrible people shouldn't win competitions

We want good people to win at life and dance. Not bad people. For this reason, it's a good thing that Buck and Wanda soon find the criminals. Layla, a rival of Katerina's, was slowly poisoning her (just so she wouldn't dance so well -- not so she would die) in order to get her evil Mommy Dearest to stop nagging.

Layla didn't commit the actual murder though. That was the fault of her smoothie-delivering boyfriend, Tommy. After a mad chase through another dance performance, the FBI arrests Layla, Tommy and Dance Mom. The day is saved!


Dancing off into the sunset

The crime solved and the evildoers packed off to jail, all that remains is a final dance from Booth and Brennan. For some reason, this dance is a waltz. It goes poorly to say the least. The judges are not particularly impressed with the train wreck, but that's because they can't feel the love tonight.

As fog fills the room and the audience falls away, Booth and Brennan begin to dance better. They may even dance this way forevermore! Ahhhhhhhh!


Fun things people said

  • "These are not in any way attractive." -- Brennan, seeing a dancer's feet
  • "Are you trying to draw an analogy between me and the smashed-up feet murder victim?" -- Angela
  • "Who wants a real life when you can dance?" -- Kendrick
  • "You were a gigolo for 30 bucks an hour." -- Sweets
  • "Your critters had more than enough time to pants the victim." -- Wendell, because maggots can apparently pull down a girl's shorts
  • "He'll dance with anyone for 30 bucks." -- Sweets
  • "You want the killer to get away? Interesting new take on your job..." -- Cam
  • "I have a lot of fun stories like that! I'm Wanda." -- Brennan
  • "The rumba's like foreplay." -- Brennan
  • "You can't rush science, Booth." -- Brennan
  • "I don't know much about dancing, but is it supposed to look like a fistfight?" -- Wendell
  • "Are we being punked?" -- Mary Murphy

Photo/Video credit: FOX