'Breaking Pointe' recap: The Agony of Wet Feet

breaking-pointe-season-1.jpgPreviously on Breaking Pointe: Everybody signed their contracts, except for Katie, who has to move to Idaho because she has bad feet. The boys danced "Petite Mort" in their tiny shorts and waved their penis swords around. Allison tortured Rex. And Ronnie bitched and moaned about how no one recognizes what a BIG STRONG MANLY MAN he is.

It's a few weeks till the show "Paquita" goes up, and this week the dancers will find out who gets which roles. Ronnie is primping himself at home. At their apartment, Allison and Katie C. are fretting over something in the stove. I suspect it's Rex's heart, or maybe his puppy. At Chris and Christiana's house, they are having a super obvious, exposition-filled conversation about work. He's adorable, but I'm fixated on how they have oddly matching noses for a married couple.

At rehearsal, everyone is way more clothed this week. It's disappointing. Allison says this show is her chance to prove she's ready to be a soloist. Ronnie tells Allison he only wants to work hard till two o'clock and then slack off. Man, I tried that today. It did not work.

Elena Kunikova is the visiting ballet lady who's helping teach and stage the ballet, which she grew up dancing in Russia. She does not seem nearly the hardass I want her to be. Adam says the casting for the male lead is between Ronnie and Rex. The role, Wikipedia tells me helpfully, is Lucien d'Hervilly, a young French officer in Napoleon's army during the occupation of Spain, who falls in love with a gypsy who turns out to be his cousin, and that's why it's okay for them to get married? Because she's his cousin and therefore not really a gypsy? Sounds cheerful and not at all racist or like there should be a modern adaptation of it set in Pennsyltucky and broadcast on this very network!