Charlie Sheen is a big fat sellout. Or his 'My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not an Option' tour is. In Detroit and Chicago.
True to his word, Charlie Sheen -- aka "The Winner" -- is pushing ahead with plans to take his show on the road. And by "show" we mean something called "My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not an Option." And, no, we have no idea what the guy is going to do on-stage, but we're sure it will involve rambling and somewhat disjointed monologues, lots of cigarettes and -- quite possibly -- a break with reality. Honestly, will the guy sing, do stand-up, spoken word, re-enact his best moments on film ("Ferris Bueller"), trash his former co-stars?
It obviously doesn't matter, because all the guy can do is win. Tickets for the show's first two dates in Detroit and Chicago sold out in a matter of minutes, according to the Detroit Free Press. Bam! Winning! According to E!, promoters are now scrambling to add up to 20-30 cities to the tour since the first two sold out in record time.
Watch this promo clip Sheen cut in which he continues to amuse, this time dropping the line "You all suffer from Sheen-is envy":
According to Sheen's official website, $1 from each ticket sold will go to the Red Cross to help victims of the Japan earthquake.
Meanwhile, back in the real world, Sheen's twin two-year-old sons celebrated their birthday on Sunday (March 13), but -- according to Us -- daddy was not invited.