'Glee' recap: Demian's Small Heart Grew Three Sizes That Day
Speaking of which, coincidentally enough: Guess who still carries a torch for that jolly old elf? None other than dear, dim Brit-Brit. Which, you know, makes a lot of sense, especially after last week's revelation regarding Jiminy Cricket and her jewelry. In any event, Artie finds this faith of Brittany's endearing, so he conspires with several other Glee Clubbers to ensure said faith endures. To that end, they all head to the mall to present an exceptionally tan Santa with their holiday wish lists, and things go swimmingly until Brittany asks Tan Santa to make Artie's legs work again. Well, actually, things go swimmingly until Tan Santa pops a roll of Certs in his pants pocket when Santana Lopez perches on his lap, but it's the Brittany thing we're supposed to be worried about. Artie and some of the other boys convince Coach Beiste to pose as Santa in order to explain to Brittany why some wishes can't ever come true, but Brittany's miserable reaction to this news softens Coach Beiste's already nougaty interior, and the coach effects a true Christmas miracle when she somehow hacks up $100,000 to buy Artie an as-yet-unreleased ReWalk. I know high school football programs are disgustingly overfunded, but really?
In other similarly heartening news, Kurt's settling in quite nicely at Dalton, thank you very much, and Finn and Rachel are dunzo. And in the end, Sue for some reason decides to deck Will's halls with boughs of holly, and I am very sad to note that "deck Will's halls with boughs of holly" is not a fun euphemism for physical violence.