'Hell's Kitchen' recap: All Elise Is Saying Is Give Elise a Chance

gordon-ramsay-hells-kitchen.jpgSo it was a good night in Hell's Kitchen. You can tell because Ramsay is smiling as he says "Get out of here" and doesn't add "**** off" like he usually does, which amounts to a goodnight kiss.

Back in the dorm, everyone has a good laugh at Jennifer's crush on Paul, which appears to somehow survive even as Paul's lifting of his jacket to massage his own nipple, whatever THAT'S supposed to be. Paul can't just say he's not into Jennifer but talks about how she's from Boston and how his dream girl would be a Jets fan. Well, there's something to be said for being polite, I suppose, but I suspect this has more to do with Paul being a coward.

There is some talk of the confidence the Black team is supposed to have after defeating a team of a bunch of other failed contestants. Yeah, I'm not sure how that's supposed to work either. The next morning, Ramsay tells them, "Chefs become heroes when they're able to take an ingredient and turn it into something with incredible value, right?" This tortured, nonsensical premise is really just a lead-in to Ramsay talking about having an Alaskan white salmon fall from the sky -- and one does, plopping right onto the table in front of him, hopefully causing little pants-****ting. (Except for Elise, because I think it would do her some good.)

Ramsay talks about the price of the salmon versus how many portions it contains and the price of each portion translating into profit, a basic calculation that appears to go right over Elise's head, which to be fair is only about four feet off the ground. Anyway! The point of this challenge is to garner the highest price for their piece of Alaskan salmon, and they have thirty minutes to do it. Jennifer in particular seems to be lost, poaching the fish with the skin off, which Will tells us is a no-no.