Kevin Smith wants to watch

Kevin Smith Jennifer Schwalbach

Director Kevin Smith got all gooey at the recent 2006 Independent Spirit Awards. Seems he took his now-wife Jennifer Schwalbach-Smith to the Spirits on their first official date eight years ago. "We actually fell in love in this tent at the Spirits," he recalled onstage.

They'd met a few weeks earlier when the leggy brunette journalist interviewed the Gen X filmmaker ("Dogma," "Mallrats," "Jersey Girl," "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back") for a USA Today profile.

And yeah, since you were wondering, Smith did get lucky that night. For more details, read his official website, Silent Bob Speaks.

Smith couldn't help but wonder if his good luck at the time might have had something to do with the fact that he took home an award that night for his "Chasing Amy" screenplay.

"But I'm not winning anything tonight so all you people holding awards have a really good shot at f---ing my wife. All I ask is that I get to watch. From under a glass table."

At the IFC after-party at Shutters on the Beach hotel, Jennifer rolled her eyes at Kev's comments. "I'm pretty used to being the brunt of Kevin's jokes," she said, giving one of those patient wife smiles.

And she got used to roughing it recently while shooting "Clerks II" on a tight budget. She has a small role in the film, making it well worth the price of admission. "We stayed in Days Inns and the only star is Rosario Dawson."

What, no Matt Damon or Ben Affleck? Darn. Double darn.

Expect Weinstein Co. to have their hands full releasing "Clerks II". Smith says he's releasing the sequel unrated. Yikes! (Or, Oh, boy! depending on your point of view.) But it may not be all that queasy-making. After all, the original "Clerks" was an NC-17 back in '94 before it came down to an R.

The always-unrated Kevin couldn't resist pushing the Indie Spirits envelope to the point of audience unease. Praising the show's hostess Sarah Silverman and her vag rinse jokes, Smith announced, "Finally, an award show host you'd like to ----. Although, Jon Stewart's not bad either."

Later, he confided that he probably had a better shot at Jon than Sarah.

"I actually think I'd do better with Jon because I'm kind of a cuddly bear and Jon usually responds very well to that."

Photo: Jennifer Schwalbach-Smith cuddles up with her teddy bear Kevin Smith on the eighth anniversary of their first date at the Independent Spirit Awards.
(Mychal Watts / WireImage)