Michelle Trachtenberg's Maxim cover: Child pageant queen or '80s porn star?

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Don't get us wrong. We love Michelle Trachtenberg. We love her from "Buffy," we love her from "Gossip Girl" and we especially love her from "The Adventures of Pete & Pete."

So know that it comes from a place of genuine respect and affection when we say that her cover shoot for the March issue of Maxim looks like an ill-fated Glamour Shots session someone just recovered from time capsule buried in 1987.

The makeup, the eyes, the hair and the obvious airbrushing all take a way from the natural beauty of the 'berg. Yes? Yes.

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Photo/Video credit: Maxim