Patton Oswalt reveals on Twitter why he'd make a horrible spokesperson

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Patton Oswalt knows how to use Twitter as a weapon. The comedian and "The Goldbergs" narrator took to the social media website to tear down a company seeking to recruit him to post sponsored tweets.

Brander Influencers' fateful tweet reads: "@pattonoswalt I'd love to invite you to get paid to tweet for awesome brands targeted at comedians and comedy fans! DM us!"

Oswalt didn't take too kindly to the offer. ".@BA_Influencers Can we cut out the middleman and you guys just take a big, wet s*** right on my soul? Might save time," he tweets, though he soon changed his tune and decided to have some fun at the company's expense.

"Hey, @BA_Influencers. Might have been a bit harsh on you guys. Let me send you some examples of my 'awesome brand tweeting.' Ready?" he posts.

His examples: 

  • ".@BA_Influencers If you hate static cling as much as God hates gays & women, then @BounceFresh dryer sheets are a must!!!"
  • ".@BA_Influencers The great taste of @SunChips won't make you forget that 'handsy' counselor at sailing camp, but they're still good."
  • ".@BA_Influencers Tired of the tooth enamel loss from bulimia? The roaring bout of diarrhea from @TacoBell keeps your smile fresh!" ".@BA_Influencers Packed with peanuts, @SNICKERS gets 'em in the van and KEEPS 'em in the van."
  • "Last one, guys: Integrity is like a pink, unsullied vagina. Let @BA_Influencers cram the Cock of Compromise balls-deep. #f*** #off"

Whoa. Do you think Oswalt handled this situation appropriately?

Photo/Video credit: Getty Images