'RuPaul's Drag Race': One big red velvet mis-cake

"RuPaul's Drag Race" took the contest to new catty heights as the queens took off more than their earrings to battle it out on Monday's (Feb. 28) episode.

There wasn't one touchy-feely moment this week for front-runner  Raja as she declared that the "Heathers" have arrived to RuVille. Based on the "B's" from the cult movie, the "Heathers" include Raja, Delta, Carmen and Manila

As Delta puts it, "We're basically the pretty girls, the top four. And then there's the other girls." Okay?

This week's mini challenge had the queens posing nude for their meals. This ended up being a very telling challenge. Of course, the skinny gals couldn't wait to tear off their clothes for the camera - well, not all of them... Alexis announced to the world that she hasn't dated in a very long time and we're about to find out why. Is Alexis a grower, not a shower? The big'uns, Staci and Delta, weren't excited about the challenge at all. But, once they were handed a purple shroud to cover up their unmentionables, you couldn't get them to stop posing. Halle-loo for small victories. 

In the end, RuPaul didn't use the challenge as a lesson on conquering one's fears and awarded the win to Carmen, whose preferred state is naked.

In the main challenge, Carmen passed cakes out to the women, which would serve as their runway fashion inspiration. After they had been working for a while, Ru threw in a twist and also had the girls decorate cakes that represent them. Those poor cakes.

The big drama of the episode revolved around Shangela's pathetic lack of ability to sew and her crocodile tears when she told RuPaul that none of the other girls helped her. Point of order, chairman! Isn't this Shangela's second round of "Drag Race"? And Shangela didn't take it upon herself to learn how to sew in the time since she was last eliminated and now? That tells us two things: Shangela doesn't learn from her own mistakes very well and she buys off the rack. Both are first-degree offenses in our book.

Of course, Ru doesn't spend enough time in the workroom to see what the other queens see and that's Alexis helping Shangela out with everything from her sewing to her hair and makeup. Put away your tears, Shangela. We don't feel bad for you.

Runway time! And before we get to the contestants, we have to give props to RuPaul's ensemble. She was feelin' every tier of that wedding cake! "Shedding for the Wedding's" Sara Rue and "Dollhouse's" Eliza Dushku joined the panel.

We think there was a definite line between the women who brought couture to the bakeshop and those who could have used a few more minutes in the oven. Our top three are Delta's angel cake meets 50s sock hop, Raja's crazy for coco-goths look (which ended up winning) and Manila's Jessica Rabbit goes to the disco take on carrot cake.

Our bottom three are Staci's red velvet mis-cake (capris on the runway, gurl?), Alexis' hotel comforter-food ensemble (that waist needed to be cinched - look like cake, not look like you ate the cake) and Yara's lost war of the roses gown.

Then, RuPaul upped the drama when she asked the queens who should go home. The Heathers quickly turned on Shangela, wanting Ru to set her halle-loose. Raja took the cake, though, when she offered up both Shangela and Staci for a one-way bus ticket home.

Ru, of sound mind and huge hands, made her decision and requested that Staci and Alexis lip-sync for their lives. We were then treated to the hottest mess of a drag show we have ever seen - that includes the "Paris is Burning" drag pageant we attended in Queens by the way. Staci should have prayed to the Native American gods for some hop in her step. While on the other end of the spectrum, Alexis jumped around like ants found their way to her picnic basket. In the end, Ru let Staci sashay away, so that she can return to where capris count as couture. And Alexis is left behind to fight off the Heathers and braid Shangela's wig for another week.

Did you think RuPaul sent the right queen home? Do you believe Raja and the Heathers need to be brought down a notch? Sound off below, Zappers!
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