'Saturday Night Live,' 'Breaking Bad' and more of the best lines on TV this week
Warning: There are both spoilers and many things said by Miley Cyrus in this article.
"I did it for me. I liked it. I was good at it." - Walter White to Skyler, admitting why he cooked meth, on "Breaking Bad"
"Actually, I quite fancy you from time to time, when you're not yelling at me." - Captain Hook to Emma on "Once Upon a Time"
"Well, anal is what we need right now." - Peter Florrick on "The Good Wife"
"It's like trying to describe salt to someone who's never tasted salt." - Virginia, explaining a female orgasm to William, on "Masters of Sex"
"That's smart. But mostly horrible." - Lance Sweets, about a killer who scattered body parts about town, on "Bones"
"You can't do that with clothes. Can you?" - Caroline, about a Kickstarter campaign for a new wardrobe, on "2 Broke Girls"
"The FBI works for me now." - Red Reddington on "The Blacklist"
"I'm not a priest." - Maria (a kidnapper) to captive Brian Sanders, when he tries to explain his extramarital affair, on "Hostages"
"Apart from the fact that I'm dying, I'm fine." - Richard Castle on "Castle"
"I believe horses are from outer space." - Nick on "New Girl"
"I believe that too!" - Jess
"OK, good." - Nick
"Now Colton, you're crying. What are you crying about? ... Meaning you're quitting? Again? So Colton, you came back for a second time because you said, 'I've changed, I've grown and I want to show everybody.' You're now doing the exact opposite ... a very selfish move. ... I'm now convinced that Colton is the guy who never should've gotten off the couch. We brought a quitter back and we got a quit again." - Jeff Probst on "Survivor: Blood vs. Water"
"It's a strategic hot mess." - Miley, about her career these days, on "Miley: The Movement"
"Do you have any idea what it's like to run in heels? I have blisters, Damon!" newly human Katherine on "The Vampire Diaries"
"Well, I don't know about 'lair,' Erin." - CNN correspondent Jim Acosta to Erin Burnett on "Erin Burnett OutFront" (after she asked if President Obama would "stay in his lair")
"Why is everyone so bad at eating?" - Ron Swanson on "Parks and Recreation"
"If you want to solve the mystery of who stabbed Koothrappali in the back with a weapon of indifference, it was all of you!" - Raj, when no one showed to his murder mystery dinner, on "The Big Bang Theory"
"My nipples are of no use to him" - Derek to Meredith, about their crying newborn, on "Grey's Anatomy"
"Couldn't we just kill another intern? It wouldn't be that hard." - Quinn on "Scandal"
"Are we gladiators? Or are we b****es?" - Harrison, to the Pope & Associates team, on "Scandal"
"Maybe you two should get a room." - McGarrett to Chin Ho, massively excited some high-tech equipment, on "Hawaii Five-0"
"If you want to put me on a leash, it better be diamond studded or you can kiss my a**." - Donatella to the creditors coming after her in "House of Versace"
"I'm having tiny strokes, yo!" - Miley Cyrus, explaining her tongue thing, on "Saturday Night Live"
"Turns out that Prime Minister Bieber was a fair and generous ruler." - Homeless Man of the Future, explaining why Canada survived the collapse of civilization, on "Saturday Night Live"
"She was murdered." - Miley Cyrus, explaining the fate of Hannah Montana, on "Saturday Night Live"
What were some of your favorite lines of the week?