'Survivor' recap: Back For More

jeff-probst-survivor-nicaragua-320.jpgWe open with Probst asking Kim how she did it, besides winning four Immunity Challenges. Kim says that she tried to make personal connections with each person, and we learn that everyone on the jury except Troy and Leif voted for her.

Probst moves right to the guys giving up Immunity (although he asks Matt about it, and Matt had already been voted out). So he redirects to Mike, who says it was a bad idea. Thanks, Mike. Jonas says that his biggest mistake was not making big moves and trying to fly under the radar. That was definitely what this season lacked and why many thought it was boring; there were very few big moves. Even the blindsides were boring.

Then comes the Colton segment. Seeing Colton kind of makes me believe in karma, because dude got faaaaaat. Like not just the usual post-island return to regular weight. He's fat. He avoids the question and denies being racist (not very convincingly, if you ask me). It's like someone told him that the things he said were bad, but he doesn't really believe that they were, but he knows he needs to pretend that he does. Then they make Colton's mom stand up and apologize for his behavior, bless her heart. And then Mayim Bialik stands up? And says that she wanted to see Colton get what was coming to him, and she'd like to see him play again. Stuff it, Blossom. And then some other guy stands up and says that he loves to hate Colton. Shut it, audience member. Also, when did Probst turn into Phil Donahue? Practicing for his upcoming talk show? And then Colton finally apologizes. Bleh.

Then Probst talks to Tarzan and it's a waste of time as usual. There is mention of his sex life with his wife. No, thank you.