Dirty Laundry: Hayden gets pierced, SJP wears a girdle, Kiki scores free duds

Scouring the Web for the best dirt. So you don't have to.

OMG! Click HERE RIGHT NOW to see Sarah Jessica Parker's granny pants! Or is a long-line girdle?  Whatever. It's just so wrong.

File this under Big Love: Jennifer Love Hewitt is engaged. Click HERE! for the scoop. I've read statistics that marriage (even an impending one?) causes weight gain. Is that why JLH looks so hugely happy in these HOT SWIMSUIT SNAPS taken on a recent Hawaiian trip with her man?

If the Catholic League keeps up the good work of publicizing Nicole Kidman's new movie, "The Golden Compass,"  the sad stinker may actually make money. Hey, it worked for "The Da Vinci Code."

Stars align with designers: Kirsten Dunst goes crazy for Miu Miu, which is great, because now she'll have a good excuse for looking like she got dressed in the dark. Stone-faced Barbie doll Victoria Beckham is the new face of Marc Jacobs. What, Amanda Lepore was booked? What happened to Marc's usually impeccable taste? Did rehab ruin it? Did he have it removed?

Britney's not pregnant. Thank heavens. But Paris Hilton wants a baby? Maybe she's just bored with dressing up her litle dogs too (insert Wicked Witch of the West cackle here).

Hayden Panettiere is seriously heating up her Good Girl image. Forget the cheerleader. Check out her Naughty Hero GQ photo spread HERE. Then watch the steamy behind-the-scenes video of the photo shoot (click HERE). And when did she get her belly button pierced? Uh-oh. Do we have another LiLo in the making? Or is it just a weird coincidence that Lindsay Lohan posed seductively in last year's GQ Man of the Year issue?