'Two and a Half Men' Charlie Sheen replacements: John Stamos and 4 other suggestions
E! News says that one plan B for "Men" is already on the table, and it involves the addition of John Stamos. CBS C.E.O Les Moonves reportedly chatted him up at a bar, discussing his possible interest in coming on as a new character to co-headline the series with Jon Cryer.
This is not the first mention of Stamos heading to "Men." Rumblings last week were silenced when Stamos let out a dismissive tweet: "Contrary to the rumors, I am not replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. however, Martin Sheen has asked me to be his son."
So it doesn't seem like the book is closed on this quite yet -- which we wouldn't mind. Stamos is a king among men, and his current recurring role on "Glee" is a waste of his good name. But there are others we think might fill the Charlie-shaped hole on the series. Allow us to share them with you.
Who better to replace Sheen than his real life brother? The actor isn't even a stranger to the series. He appeared in a 2008 episode as one of Charlie's old drinking buddies. We suggest that his character's twin (Estevez died the first time around) shows up on their door, destitute, looking for his brother's friend, only to find that he's driven off a cliff or gone to jail. Alan will feel guilty and take him in. It'll be like the pilot all over again.
Also an ideal choice, Bradley Whitford is twice the man and actor that Charlie Sheen is. He's talented ("The West Wing"), swarthy when necessary ("The Good Guys") and knows what it's like to have Martin Sheen as a father figure. Our only problem with this choice is that we may love him too much to see him exchange obvious barbs with Angus T. Jones.
Harry Dean Stanton
We wrestled with which "Pretty in Pink" alum we wanted to see reunite with Cryer, but Stanton has been exceptionally missed since he was killed off on "Big Love." We suggest he play the caustic ghost of Charlie and Alan's father, Frank Harper, who comes to haunt their home after Charlie's off-screen departure. Only Alan can see or hear him. hijinks ensue!
Wild card! Confession: we have not been able to stop thinking about Victoria Jackson since we saw her creepy, racist and ultimately hilarious song about our president, "There's a Communist Living in the White House." She can play a baby-voiced sociopath Charlie beds one night and then murders him for never calling her back. (Like a more extreme Melanie Lynskey.) Alan and Jake are held hostage by her, "Misery"-style, for an entire season while she decides what to do with Charlie's body.