If people keep saying it, eventually it may be true

Even as some less-reputable sources are suggesting that the couple may be kaput, US Weekly is reporting that Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn are engaged -- for real this time.

Actually, US Weekly appears to be reporting that Aniston and Vaughn have been engaged since the end of June, which is appropriate, since the last time the magazine reported that they were engaged it was, indeed, the beginning of July.

Back in July, the magazine had a source claiming that Aniston told a friend "We're getting married." That, though, was too distant and too vague. Now, US Weekly had has an unnamed "friend of the couple," announcing -- without any ambiguity -- "They're engaged! Vince almost cries whenever he tells the story of the proposal."

Apparently Vaughn popped the question with a diamond ring when the couple was flying back from a romantic sojourn at Joe "Girls Gone Wild" Francis' $25 million dollar Mexican abode. To distract readers from the near-heartbreaking news that the founder of "Girls Gone Wild" can afford a $25 million Mexican abode, the magazine throws in the only detail that matters -- Vaughn's ring was bigger than the one Brad Pitt gave Aniston when last the "Friends" star married.

None of this is coming from the Vaughn or Aniston camps, of course. The "Break-Up" stars haven't actually admitted that they're dating.

In fact, a British tabloid is reporting that Vaughn and Aniston have broken up over the "Swingers" star's refusal to wed.

"Talk of marriage or engagement is complete hogwash," a "source" tells the Star. "Vince appears to have gone distant, and Jen is looking no further than a day at a time. There have been rumours of an engagement, even claims they married in secret. But those stories are without foundation."

Uh-oh. Sounds like we need for the Star source and the US Weekly friend to have a little sit-down to get their stories straight.

Update: By midday on Wednesday (Aug. 9), Aniston's publicist Stephen Huvane told "Entertainment Tonight" that "It is not true. There is no engagement."

That denial prompted US Weekly to delve into the archives for previous denials courtesy of Huvane, who also told the magazine that Pitt and Aniston weren't engaged (when they were), that they weren't splitting up (when they seem to have) and several other quotes of questionable veracity.

Now, more than ever, doesn't our country need somebody and something to believe in? Won't somebody please think of the children?