What do you want from us? We tried for 10 years and we just couldn't make it work. Sure, the critics sometimes enjoyed our shows, like when we did "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" or "Everwood" or "Veronica Mars," but our ratings peaked early with "7th Heaven" and "Star Trek: Voyager," we couldn't buy Emmy nominations and we never really were able to get that game-changing hit show or two. Heck, where would FOX be if "The Simpsons" hadn't broken out? Trust us. We know.
So we're going with the "united we stand, divided we fall" theory, or perhaps with the All-You-Can-Eat Chinese Buffet theory. Take what you want and leave the rest. Like our motto says: Free To Be Schizophrenic. You like wrestling? We've got that. You like pretty boys fighting supernatural forces? We've got that. You like pretty girls talking quickly? We've got that. You like reality shows? We've got a couple of those. How about urban comedies? They're all squished in a block on Sundays.
Sure, we're only premiering two new shows this fall, but for all of you viewers who have never watched "Veronica Mars" before, that'll be new to you.
And you know the best thing? Nobody has to finish in sixth.
Daniel Fienberg