It's all about honesty for North Carolina native

A hopeful mantra runs through Kellie Pickler's conversation with reporters one day after her "American Idol" elimination -- If this is as bad as I got it, I got it good.

For three months, the 19-year-old from Albemarle, North Carolina has heard the whispers from naysayers who muttered that she couldn't possibly be so ditzy, she couldn't truly be so innocent.

"People are going to believe what they want to believe," Pickler says. "But you know, I've started out from the beginning just being who I am. I've been real from the beginning, honest with my life and who I am. I don't have anything to hide. I don't have anything to lie about."

And you wanna know the funny thing? She sounds entirely genuine. She seems just as truthful and candid when she discusses her final two performances, weeks in which she was quick to admit that she hadn't been at her best. She scoffs at the idea that she was just posturing, trying to use pity for votes.

"Well, 30 million, 40 million are watching, and they see your performance," she notes. "They see that you've messed up, and the judges know that, and I knew that I did. And what was I going to do? Lie, and say, 'Oh, I didn't mess up' and blame it on things? I think that when you're just honest about it that it's better rather than to try to make excuses for why you didn't have a good performance. I messed up the words in some of them. I've messed up the songs, and I've been off key and pitchy, and you just admit it."

She adds, "I was not surprised at all last night because, to tell you the truth, I thought I was going home last week, but the fans voted and kept me in for another week. I deserved to get the boot this week because I had two bad performances back-to-back. There's no excuse."

Pickler knows that while her honest made her a fan favorite this season, it also rubbed some people the wrong way, viewers who thought her personal stories -- an absent mother and a father in prison -- were another plea for sympathy.

"Going into this competition I was never really completely open about the different life obstacles that I've had to overcome because I was so embarrassed about it," Pickler begins. "I got a lot of criticism for crying about my dad and my mom and my family in the beginning, but it was really hard for me because I've not, it's not like I was used to getting on national television in front of 40 million people talking about my life."

Rarely has a contestant used "American Idol" as a vehicle for personal therapy, but it sounds as if even in elimination, Pickler is in a better place now.

"I'm not ashamed of my life anymore. For so long, I felt like I was looked down upon because of my family. I don't feel that way anymore. I've very proud to say I'm Kellie Pickler. I'm very proud to say where I've come from."

With the rest of her life about to begin, it sounds like Pickler doesn't know where to start.

"I hope that I will be able to pursue music, as well as TV and film -- anything that life throws me, I want to take advantage of every opportunity that I'm given," she says. "So, I feel like I'm young. I have no strings attached anywhere. I'm ready to roll."