Financially Fit to be Tied

Buy low. Sell high. It makes sense even to the slowest of minds. But doing it is a thousand times harder than we'd like it to be. That's why the world needs Jim Cramer of CNBC's daily "Mad Money." He explains what's happening in today's financial markets in a calm and soothing manner that doesn't make you panic when your life savings could possibly go the way of Enron.

OK, that's not exactly accurate. Cramer has the subtly of a wrecking ball and the head to match. But when it comes crazy people talking about what to do with your money, no one is more stylish. (It should be noted that he is the only crazy person we know who talks about money.) Wall Street has a reputation for snazzy dressers - which isn't surprising when you figure the cash changing hands. The Street also recognizes the importance of traditional dress - a suit and tie lets people know that you are a serious person and understand the gravitas of dealing with money.

For Cramer, that suit doesn't stand a chance. He's so hyper that the jacket barely finds its way inside the studio and before you know it he's unbuttoned the cuffs and rolled his sleeves so far up his arm you'd think he was planning to pull a calf from a pregnant cow. But one thing that never wavers is the necktie. He keeps that thing tied so snuggly around his neck it's a wonder he can talk at all. Imagine what would come out of his mouth if he loosened it a little.

But shockingly, Cramer does have a sartorial flaw - his ties are too long. A properly tied necktie - normal ties come in various lengths from 52 to 58 inches -should fall just to the top of your belt buckle. Any lower and you'll look like a dink, any higher and you'll look like a dweeb. Trust us, we're experts. Between the long tie and the rolled up sleeves Cramer gives the impression he is four feet tall.

Varying the length of the tie will also give a false impression of the tie's width, which changes with styles. A standard 3.5-inch width is considered classic and supposedly never goes out of style. And every different style of knot - Windsor, half-Windsor, four-in-hand, Pratt knot, etc. - changes where the tie end will fall.

But what should you look for when buying a necktie? Today there are no hard and fast rules regarding tie style, but quality is another story. Look for 100-percent silk, whether it be woven or printed - printed silk means that it is flat with no detectable weave. The heavier the silk the better a necktie will drape, but it might also narrow your options for knotting. A tie should be lined - preferably in wool - and be tipped in the same or contrasting silk the rest of the tie is made from. Another obvious sign of quality is the loop on the back of the tie. Good quality ties have loops made from the same fabric as the tie itself. High quality ties have the loops hand stitched.