TV Gal Offers Job Placement Services
The TV industry is a fickle business. Beloved shows are canceled (let's pause once again for a moment of silence for "Veronica Mars") Favorite characters are suddenly written/killed off (I trace all of "24's" problems last season to the death of Curtis). Series that have potential are pulled after two episodes (honestly, why did FOX even air "Drive"?). Pilots that networks actually announce never see primetime (just this week I got an e-mail about NBC's "The Singles Table," which I believe will never see the light of TV). And even when we are lulled into a sense of security, shows are suddenly thrust into danger (it can't be good that the repeats of "Friday Night Lights" were pulled or that the show's biggest supporter no longer works for NBC).
When the new fall season starts in a couple months (whoo-hoo), there will be some very familiar faces in the television class of '07-'08. We'll say a big "welcome back" to -- among others -- Michael Vartan, Jean Smart, Dylan McDermott, Kelsey Grammer, Patricia Heaton, Brooke Shields and Peter Krause. And before we even had a chance to miss them, Melissa McCarthy ("Gilmore Girls"), Jerry O'Connell ("Crossing Jordan"), Kim Raver ("24" "The Nine"), Barry Watson and Sarah Lancaster ("What About Brian") all have roles on new shows next season.
And the best news last week was surely that Jason Dohring, Logan on "Veronica Mars," will join the cast in the new CBS drama "Moonlight." Some of you are already pre-emptively declaring that this will make "Moonlight" my new favorite show. I'll at least watch an episode before I make that call.
But, alas, some adored television stars are still not on the television schedule. And this makes me a little cranky. So I'm making a personal plea to the powers that be at the networks. Here are the television stars we need to get back on primetime. Stat. And no I don't care if they have movie careers, I want them back in my TiVo season pass manager.
Last seen on primetime: Dying on "24." I still miss Tony, Tony, Tony.
Recommendation: His FOX sitcom "Nurses" didn't get a pickup, but I'm fairly certain that "Grey's Anatomy" is looking for a new doctor. Perhaps he could come to Seattle Grace and treat Callie right.
Last seen: As troubled chef Jack Bourdain on FOX's short-lived "Kitchen Confidential."
Recommendation: Cooper is at his best when he gets to leverage his self-deprecating and charming sense of humor. I see him as a potential love interest for Liz on "30 Rock."
Last seen: Finally getting the girl on the series finale of "Dawson's Creek."
Recommendation: I'm thinking he so needs to date Rebecca on "Brothers & Sisters."
Last seen: As the tree-hugging Che on "The O.C." and, of course, my beloved Bright on my beloved "Everwood."
Recommendation: The big problem for "24" this season has been a serious lack of personality in CTU and sure there may not even be a CTU next season but maybe Pratt could help Jack with his technologies issues and be a good foil for Chloe.
Last seen: Shaving her head on "Veronica Mars," and as the caustic teen turned movie executive on "Arrested Development."
Recommendation: She would fit right in with the doctors of Sacred Heart. Let's make her Dr. Cox's new nanny on "Scrubs."
Last seen: Hugging best friend Rory good-bye in the penultimate episode of "Gilmore Girls."
Recommendation: With "The Office's" Karen off to the new FOX comedy "The Rules for Starting Over," they're going to need to fill that position. Weil could cause all sorts of trouble for Dwight.
Last seen: Meeting a fiery death as Kendall Casablancas on "Veronica Mars."
Recommendation: I always felt Carpenter would fit right in as the new gal pal of the "Sex and the City" ladies. Since that's no longer an option for her, can't Darren Star put her on his new series "Cashmere Mafia"? Pretty please.
This list is only a start. Who would you like to see on television next season? Write me at email@example.com and let me know. I'll have your suggestions in my column next week.
Quotes of the Week
"I think she'll still probably get high, but she'll offer some to the housekeeper." Dennis Miller about Paris Hilton on "The O'Reilly Factor." Thanks to Barry for the quote.
"And you thought nuns were tough." Lt. Provenza to the priest about Chief Johnson Thanks to JoAnn for the quote.
"Okay, here's how it goes. It's kind of complicated. I'm 32 of 56 children, and when I married Roman, I became my own step-grandma, because my father married Roman's daughter, Bayliene. So little Josie, that makes you my step-grandma and I'm your step-mom and when I had Alby, he became my great uncle and I became his great-great-grandmother, which of course makes me my own grandmother." Adaleen Grant attempting to explain the family tree to Josie on "Big Love." Thanks to Travis for the quote.
Where Have I Seen Them Before?
DJ recognized Sofia Vergara as Vince's new co-star on "Entourage." She was Esperanza Villalobos on "The Knights of Prosperity" and Lola Hernandez on "Hot Properties."
The People Have Spoken
Last week I asked you what summer reality competition show I should be watching and you answered with a resounding "So You Think You Can Dance?" You guys are like my own personal magic eight ball. Should I get my hair lighted? Am I getting enough calcium every day? Are these jeans flattering?
But I do promise to start watching the show. I can't next week because FOX isn't airing it (booooo) but will start right after that.
Highlights of the Week Ahead
All times listed are Eastern Time for July 2 to 8
So is it better or worse that FOX is burning off the final two episodes of "Drive" Wednesday at 8 p.m? I guess they could have never aired them at all, but really airing them on July 4 is simply not nice. My guess is the episodes will leave us hanging and, well, that's not very nice either. You can add Nathan Fillion as my pick as someone who should always have his own show.
"Big Brother" returns for an eighth season Thursday at 8 p.m. on CBS. You can watch the 24-hour feed via cbs.com and if you want to see all the naughty things that transpire during the night, Showtime will air "Big Brother: After Dark" for three hours every night beginning at midnight. Something tells me I'm too young to watch.
"ER" (Thursday at 10 p.m. on NBC) had a rocky year and a disastrous season finale but they still know how to let a guest star shine. John Mahoney played a man who has no rights when his long time partner is brought into the emergency room. It's a heartbreaking hour that practically guarantees Mahoney an Emmy nomination.
You would be nuts not to watch "Jericho" this Friday at 9 p.m. on CBS. CBS picked up the series for seven more episodes (you'll see them sometime midseason) after you guys were outraged by its cancellation. So we really need to tune in, don't you think?
Well that's all for today. Have a fantastic July 4th holiday. I hope you're going some place fabulous. I'll be back next week with a review of the new ABC Family drama "Greek" (could this be my new "90210"?) and to discuss the return of "Monk" and "Psych." Have a question, seen a familiar face or want to nominate a quote of the week. Write me at firstname.lastname@example.org.