TV Fashion: Dog of 'Dog the Bounty Hunter' (A&E)
An outlaw when it comes to fashion
First, there is the sweet sense of justice being dished out to losers who've run from the law. Then there is Dog himself and his personal style, which seems to be a born-again cross between a pale Mr. T and an outlaw Hercules with an Olympian mullet.
But it is his taste in women that really gets our attention - particularly his charming fireplug of a wife, Beth. When they finally married in Hawaii after 16 years together, Beth wore a lovely off-white lace and silk gown by Eduardo Lucero and Dog sported white jeans and a white leather vest.
Beth's daily style is almost beyond words - assuming we are restricted to English - and might best be described as a combination of game show hostess, Gotti cousin and SWAT team member. Bleached blonde, pleasantly plump, with the requisite dog tags around her neck and a variety of American Indian accessories - though she's Italian through and through - Beth is, for the lack of a better word, unique.
But the fact is we love her for reasons we can't quite put our finger on - at least not without Dog breaking our arm. Let's just say that when you first see her, there are two things that immediately jump out at you. We should thank the heavens that television hasn't quite gotten the 3-D technology figured out yet because every time Beth turned to face the camera, viewers across the globe would simultaneously bang their heads against the back walls of their living rooms, her chest is that big. Seriously, it's like two toddlers trapped in a sports bra.
That's why this week we salute the power of Lycra, spandex and elastane. They offer a combination of style, support and durability and have helped keep Beth from injuring herself during arduous and bouncy pursuits of bail jumpers. Thank you, DuPont, for doing more than inventing Teflon and sponsoring Jeff Gordon's car!
Sure it sounds stupid, but when you're a girl built like an old Commodores song, special care needs to be taken for comfort. True, it might be nice to be admired for your ample endowments and the luxury of having what appears to be a personal shelf with which to do office work on the go, but potential back problems are a real concern for big-bosomed gals such as Beth and Dolly Parton. The only thing more supportive might be a Kevlar brassiere and the Make-A-Wish Foundation.
Nevertheless, because Beth has all the support she needs, she's free to take away the freedom of people who don't deserve any support.